The Jasmine and the Fig

The King loves figs, and the Queen's family has a rich history in fig trees. At one point I had taken cuttings of my grandmother's fig trees, but alas... the cuttings didn't magically turn into trees like I'd hoped.

So last year I purchased another fig tree, a tiny one that I wouldn't technically classify as a 'tree' so much as a sprout... and then I proceeded to run over it with the lawnmower. 

In addition to killing the tree, I thought I'd ruined the mower, because I'd surrounded the tiny tree with big rocks to draw attention to it (and still managed to mow over it), and as the blades passed over the rocks there was a loud *POP* and the mower died. Turns out, it jiggled a connection loose, and once that was repaired, the royal mower was fine.

Today marked the arrival of my new fig tree as well as a beautiful jasmine. Oh happy day!

The poor things were baking in the mailbox for a couple of hours before I got to them, but they look great and I am very, very happy. I purchased from an Etsy seller named 9GreenBox and if I need more trees I will definitely order from them again.

The little leaf on the bottom may be broken beyond repair but I'm going to give it a couple of days to be sure.

They were taped to keep the soil in, then put into a plastic bag (I assume to capture the moisture). The instructions were basically to remove that material and soak the rootballs for about an hour (ha! rootballs, yes, the Queen still finds this humorous). After that the plants are pretty much good to go. And they do look like they perked up.

I expect that the jasmine will start to spread out a little as time goes on. Isn't it pretty? The King and I are both excited... we love jasmine.

You can also see that my parsley cutting has started to unwilt. Yeah, that's a word. So I hope that my cutting experiment is a success and as my plants grow I can further propagate them. Free plants!!!

And more exciting still, I have four little green sproutlings in the lettuce pot!

Grow babies grow!

Poor Daisy Bear had a tick on her snout this morning, very close to her nose. I have a metal tick key that I have used with mixed results, but this was a sensitive area and I didn't really want to take the chance that I would hurt her. Besides, about half the time, the head doesn't come along for the ride.

Lucky for me I had just received my Tick Twister in the mail. They look like a cross between a little plastic crowbar and a gardening trowel, and they come in packs of two with a smaller and larger version to handle different sized ticks. You put the slit around the tick, then twirl. The tick gets disoriented and lets go... and then you have him.

Another great thing about them? You don't have to touch the tick, because that really creeps me out.

I didn't think it was going to be as easy as they made it look, but the tick just let go. No tugging at all! The head was still attached... All that was left to do was flush it down the toilet or burn it with fire (guess what I chose to do).

If you would like a Tick Twister of your own, you can find it here. By purchasing through my affiliate link, you contribute to the Queen's coffers, which allows me to continue to feed the royal hounds. The link goes to the pack of 2, but you can also select a single pack of two for $5.99.

The Queen thinks the Tick Twister is THE MOST AWESOME THING EVER!!!

So that's all for tonight... not the most exciting day ever, but I have to find excitement where I can.

The Royal Diet

There are two meanings to the word diet... one implies starving oneself to lose weight, and the other simply means the food you eat. This is the meaning the Queen prefers.

The Queen loves food. It's obvious to all who gaze upon her curvaceous figure.

I have learned that the spread you use when you make a sandwich will greatly affect the flavor, and by adding pressed garlic to mayonnaise, any sandwich can attain greatness.

I broiled broccoli, yellow bell pepper and onions to soften and caramelize them. While that was going on, I fried the bacon. Then I smeared garlic mayo on the bread, added the veggies and topped it with fresh mozzarella before broiling it a second time.

I have to say, it was tasty.

This is an amalgamation of ingredients that I tossed into a bowl because I didn't want to cook. It's basically a can of chickpeas (aka garbanzo beans), a packet of tuna, a handful of shelled pistachios, a few kalamata olives that I chopped up, some fresh yellow bell pepper, fresh mozzarella in small cubes, and a bed of arugula. The dressing is just salt, pepper, red wine vinegar and olive oil. Then it was topped with a little manchego.

Delicious and filling... and plenty of leftovers.

Chicken, Blueberry & Arugula Salad. One of the most delicious things I've eaten.

If you recall, the Queen went blueberry picking last week, so I still had a few fresh blueberries that needed to be used up. I also needed to trim up my basil, so I decided to make a salad. You can find the recipe here. 

The Queen totally buys into the idea that food should look good and taste good, too, and these three dishes filled that bill nicely. And they are simple. I imagine being able to eat more like them if have a garden full of veggies.

Speaking of which, I already have a tiny sproutling from my lettuce planting the other day! That was quick. It will be interesting to see what it grows into, my bet is arugula, and that suits me fine because I eat it all the time. If I can grow a continual supply of it, the Queen will be most happy indeed.

As for the rest of the transplants and cuttings, they still appear to be alive, so perhaps I did something right.

A Transplant Story

The Queen's thumb isn't exactly green. Not even the thumbnail is green unless painted so (thank goodness for that, eh?). Nevertheless, I yearn to grow plants and someday hope to have a successful garden - nay, a farm. Probably a hobby farm, but perhaps a full fledged sell-vegetables-to-the-masses type farm with moo cows, chickens and hoppity rabbits with adorable twitchy noses.

But we all must start somewhere. Until the Queen obtains a tiller, her options are much reduced in scope and today we take a tour of the royal gardens, such as they are.

This is a Draecana deremensis I obtained from Walmart (the Queen's shopping options are also limited). It was languishing in the original pot, doing an admirable job of holding on, but it was time for a bigger pot. As a bonus, its new abode also better matches the Queen's abode. The color is less of an intense blue than it appears here, I would call it a muted turquoise.

Since my land holdings don't pay revenue and those serfs are still a pipe dream, I was frugal and only spent $1.98 on the two candle holders at Goodwill. The Queen loves to shop at Goodwill.

Until I can get plants in the ground I am relying on my AeroGarden to supply me with fresh herbs. This one is kind of nifty because it uses LED lights that don't need to be replaced like the bulbs on older models. It is very, very bright and needs to be relocated (it's in front of the television right now), but until the royal electrician fixes the outlets in the kitchen, this is where it shall reside. If you want an AeroGarden like the Queen's you can find it by clicking this affiliate link. Purchasing it through an affiliate link costs you nothing but puts about $10 into the Queen's landscaping fund.

In front of the royal garden is a cute little succulent vignette. The Queen adores succulents. They don't require much love and they reproduce like crazy, so in the future, I will have free plants that I can use in my landscaping. The Queen loves free plants.

In fact, this is a little succulent sproutling that I harvested last night. I stuck it into a pot and hopefully it will take root and make little succulent babies of its own.

It sounds as if I want to eat them doesn't it? But they are actually called succulents.

This is our lucky bamboo. Does it work? Well, our luck has changed for the better since I brought it home. AND I've managed to keep it alive for over a year now, so the bamboo itself should be feeling pretty lucky!

And next to it is another succulent. It was in an ugly nursery container so after I transplanted the aloe vera I repurposed the container. It's a cute little clay pot, so why not? (free)

This aloe vera has really grown. If you can imagine, it was in that little clay pot and there just wasn't enough room in there. So I moved it to a bigger container. It's still probably too small, but we are taking baby steps here...

Yes, more succulents. The two smaller ones are babies that I plucked mercilessly away from their mothers and repotted. Soon they will have their revenge... they will take over the castle and there will no room for anything but succulents...

Fancy aerial view. I rented an airplane and everything.

This is an experiment. I took cuttings of parsley, rosemary and thyme and dipped them into some rooting compound to see if I can grow more free plants. The Queen is impatient, and this is like the gardening version of fast forwarding through the commercials.

Last year I subscribed to an online video course by The Smiling Gardener (not an affiliate link) and I've been watching more of the videos. If you are interested in gardening I highly recommend it, the videos are short so if your attention span is also short (like the Queen's) it is a great way to learn. Phil is easy to listen to and does a good job of explaining things, but I also like that he shows you how to do them and tells you why.

I feel as if I should play some Simon & Garfunkel to encourage them to grow.

It's not much to look at is it? Completely uninteresting except for the fact that it's upside down.

I planted a bunch of random seeds in the hopes that I can grow my own salads. There are mustard greens in there, spinach, arugula (the Queen's favorite!), mache, and a few different kinds of lettuce. I'm going biointensive and not worrying about the spacing because I figure I'll be lucky if anything grows.

How fancy is that? "Biointensive," normally I would just call it randomly tossing a bunch of seeds into a pot and overcrowding it, but that's actually a thing now...

I did as I was taught... I soaked the seeds in a seaweed based sludge (affiliate link) for six hours. Soaking them gives them a head start on hydration, probably makes the skin of the seed easier for the plant to emerge from, and the seaweed has a hormone in it that encourages plants to grow. I then inoculated them with mycorrhizal fungi to help grow a strong root structure. I added some water retaining agents into the soil along with a peat mixture (which I think is right), and I watered the soil before and after planting. I sprinkled the seeds into the soil and didn't really worry about covering them except with a light dusting of peat. Now it's sitting in front of a window that gets a lot of sunlight, and I have my fingers crossed.

This is my monster basil. It was doing horribly for a while until I pinched it back and added some Miracle Gro to the soil. I know it isn't ideal to add MG, but it helped a lot. Ideally these plants would be outside thriving in the soil, but you do what you have to do.

In between the basil is this Pinterest thing I'm trying with lemon seeds. I don't expect the seeds to grow trees, much less trees that I can harvest from, but if that happens I will be on cloud 9. Aside from homegrown tomatoes there is no food in life that I love more than lemons.

Look at those gorgeous big leaves!

These plants are waiting to be put into the ground. I have my eye on a used tiller, so when the King gets home we will take a look-see and hopefully we can get some landscaping done.

I have a few coleus, a eucalyptus, I think the big plant at the bottom is lemon balm. A couple of tomato plants, two rosemarys, one thyme, some parsley, another succulent... and I ordered some trees from the Arbor Day Foundation.

When the King and Queen lived in the royal RV I had a couple of plum trees that we toted around with us and they were doing pretty well... but then the RV went into the shop and we couldn't take them with us as we shuffled between friends and family and hotel rooms, so they died... I wish I had them now because the plum trees would have been a decent size by now. But in any case, I love the 10 "free" trees you get for joining... I love trees in general. In addition to those I ordered some fruit trees and a couple of forsythia because those do really well out here and they are gorgeous. Can't wait to have a beautiful yard! I mean... a Queenly courtyard. *ahem*

I am planning on taking a cutting my grandmother's fig tree, but I also have a figlet coming from an Etsy seller (support small business!), and jasmine... because the Queen's favorite scent is jasmine. Unfortunately jasmine is not suited for this climate, but I'm going to attempt to grow it in a pot so that it can be brought in over the winter. I may try lemon and limes that way as well because I would love to have fresh citrus fruit. Eventually perhaps the King will help me put my greenhouse up... we have to have a spot leveled first because the royal grounds are a series of hills with no flat spots to be found except within the castle... and even that might be pushing it.

My sycamore is looking purdy. Next year I might prune off some of the lower branches. I like to let them grow for at least three years before I start to do that. Though after watching the pruning videos I may just leave it to grow as it wishes.

Hydrangeas!

They are zombie hydrangeas because they literally came back from the dead. They were sitting in their original pots on the back patio, untouched, unwatered, I thought they were dead and just hadn't tossed them out yet. I was just about to walk them to the trashcan when I noticed that they weren't quite dead yet... yes, just like Monty Python! So I thought 'what the heck, I'll put them into the ground and see what happens... can't get any worse.'

So I did... and two years later they are slowly but surely growing. I actually like that they are green and pink. I like the blue, pink and purple, but something about this color combo is my favorite.

Happy accidents.

So I will leave you with that uplifting story of triumph over adversity and return to my royal duties. If you have any gardening tips feel free to share them below. I'm ravenous for knowledge on the topic.

The Road Less Traveled

The Queen had to drop the King off at the airport the other day. The airport is over an hour away so more often than not I prefer the expedient route rather than the scenic one, because most routes around here are scenic. But... there is always the road less traveled, places I have yet to explore in my more than two years in the area.

I decided to turn the return trip into a sightseeing trip, taking my time and exploring roads I normally pass up. I apologize in advance, it was spur of the moment and I didn't bring my camera so most of these pictures were taken with my phone.

There is a town where they first reduce the speed limit from 55 mph to 45 mph and then further reduce it to 35 mph. The royal Mini hates it. And then cops wait in the median, on the shoulder, in parking lots... anywhere really, hoping to catch people "speeding" through town. The Queen hates that.

This route avoids that town. I'm not sure it makes the trip any quicker because the roads are hilly and winding and it may even be a longer route, but it is certainly a more enjoyable one. And if you choose, you can make a side trip to the dam.

So I made the side trip. There was a beaver playing on the rocks, but by the time I saw him he had already disappeared. He didn't build this dam so the Queen let him go about his business.

Further up the road there is what is known as a 'scenic overlook'. When the Queen notices signs for a 'scenic overlook' it is usually worth a look-see.

This one was no exception.

My GPS didn't know what to do... Where are we? I don't know. I think we're somewhere in this general area. Just keep driving... drive faster, I think I hear banjos.

Also, look at that hairpin turn coming up! How exciting - the royal Mini loooooves hairpin turns! Though this one is not as exciting as another hairpin turn that's just down the road. which is really more like a hairpin that got stomped on. It's pretty much a left hand turn... but it's not.

The view from one of my favorite farms.

A little western vignette in the east.

A giant's toes peeking out of the dirt. Hello!

My favorite thing... an empty road. I can get out of the car, stand in the middle of the road and not get mowed down. Yes, I did actually get out of the car and stand in the middle of the road, all the while imagining a car coming out of nowhere at a ridiculous speed and mowing me down.

More old buildings in the weirdest, most unpopulated places.

We have barns all over the place. Some are red, some are black, I even saw a green one the other day. And then there are the tobacco barns that don't have siding on them just a roof and beams. They hang the tobacco leaves from the rafters and the air circulates around them to dry them out.

A branch of the family tree.

Grain silo and a Civil War Trail sign.

Tobacco. We see a lot of corn, soybean and tobacco crops out here.

Tobacco barn in the distance.

Corn, most likely field corn for cows. Even though cows aren't supposed to eat corn.

Or maybe it's for ethanol. Even though cars don't really need ethanol.

One of four local lumber mills. It's amazing that we have any trees left, but we do.

Wild blackberries... vicious little creatures. They grow everywhere out here but the fruit is hard won. Between the thorns, the bumblebees and the beetles it's almost not worth it.

Almost.

A house that is rotting... it's too bad no one took care of it.

The 'backwater'

Another old garage in the middle of nowhere.

And then, the Queen was home.